The SEXY themes of Westgate
Sex.
It deserves its own paragraph. Book probably. Or volumes of books rather.
It’s a touchy subject. You write a book with sex as a huge part of the plot and you’re going to turn some people off. Or on. I wasn’t really trying to do either. I was just being honest with something that is extraordinarily polarizing.
Sex isn’t one thing. It’s many. It’s love. Hate. Submission. Power. Energy. Beauty. Ugly. Connecting. Repelling. Soft. Hard. Animal. Spiritual. Fulfilling. Surf. Diminishing. Lustful. Jealous. Needy. It’s a weapon. A gift. And so many other things, that one could just make their fingers bleed writing what it is. And what it is, is different to all of us.
Its force on the world is as strong a pull as is money. Which is probably tied with sex anyhow and has about as many nuances.
Some people need it all the time. Daily. Many times a day. Once a week. Three times. Never. To some people it is a beautiful spiritual connecting act where two become one. And some use it as a weapon to force their power over another. That act alone can break someone’s spirit forever. Or, on the other hand, be the loveliest culminating human expression of love there is.
Scheduling sexy and surfy time
Some people have sexual needs that are despicable, where they use it as a self-fulfilling fantasy with helpless victims who have no control either due to age or strength. Those poor people’s lives are forever changed because of the selfish whims of another’s lack of control over themselves or their urges. I don’t even know where urges like that come from. Somewhere like hell comes to mind.
Some people’s relationships are based on sex alone. They are in a place where just that act keeps them there while all the rest of their world is crumbling around them. And they can’t even see it. Some, where one partner is perfectly happy with their current sexual situation while the other is dying a slow lonely death.
Some people like to share, to see their other with another. And they live happily and sexually fulfilled doing so.
Others, and I think most others, never see the sex that they desire. They live out their lives in misery, never communicating their true sexual nature, pinned down by society’s “norms” or Puritan values where sex is for procreation and nothing to be sought after further than that. Where they fear their lover’s retribution or shaming for wanting some sickening perverted thing that only a degenerate sex addict would desire. A desire that probably many other people experience and enjoy. But they never will.
I know people who are a-sexual. People who don’t care to ever have it. I’ve known people with many sexual partners. And many who have had only one.
You see, it’s not something to be taken lightly. Wars have been fought over sex. Think about Helen of Troy. I mean, it wasn’t exactly sex that caused the Greeks to take her, but her beauty. I have to say, however, would Menelaus, king of Sparta actually have fought to get her back if she wasn’t good in bed? I think not. There had to be something there.
Sex is a powerful powerful life force.
It can really mess someone up or can really fulfill an important aspect of their lives. So, when I wrote about it, I had to face my own ideas about the act. Or the idea. Or whatever it is. I had to think about my own fantasies. What would I do if I could? If I could do anything? Of course, I’m not going to divulge any of them to my kind readers and have them become unkind. But as always, Rumi’s quote speaks to me. “I should be suspicious of what I want.”
I love that. It made me think, as I think a few or many of us do, that maybe some things are better left as fantasies. I for one, don’t want to get “everything” I want. Some of that shit might be bad for me in disastrous ways. Now I’m not talking about anything that would harm another or do anything with a less than, not only willing, but all-in partner, where it’s not only “yes” but “Hell Yes!!!” I’ve seen lives and relationships ruined by taking such an adventure to those lofty heights.
But on the other hand, I know people who do stuff that would make a porn star blush, and they are perfectly happy and secure with that experience, with no repercussions other than a good time.
We all fall somewhere along the line of sexuality. That one end where it’s not important, then flowing through to the really connected good healthy experiences, then down to the addictions, and worse.
So, for the most part I don’t judge. At all. Except for the rapists and pedos and sex traffickers and the losers who use them to get their rocks off because they’re too weak to get it on their own.
Like I said, it’s a powerful polarizing thing. It can make you or break you. Build you up or tear you down. You could be miserable or fulfilled. It’s a hard gig. Mostly with no easy answers. Or maybe it’s only something we can answer for ourselves. Or just do. Or be.
Yeah, I knew it would be a polarizing topic. I like that though. Not on purpose to get a rise out of someone… no pun intended. But because it’s all around us all the time. In our hearts and in our minds. It’s such a powerful thing.
I went down that road with Westgate. It led where it led. Not everybody is going to like it. And not even for the content. Maybe the writer just sucks.
But either way, it was a fun journey, always keeping in mind that I should be suspicious of what I want.
Sort of…
Check out my latest book, Westgate: A Nick Marino Mystery
It’s got mystery, sex, thrills, spills, sex, action, and sex!
Detective Murder Mystery, Westgate tells the story of Nick Marino who just wants to surf. But he’s gotta eat, so he works as a cop in Santa Ana, California. It’s not that he doesn’t like being a cop, but it does get in the way of his surfing sometimes.